Saturday, April 14, 2007

By 30

I found this as I was cleaning out and organizing my documents today. It struck me as a worthy blog topic as I approach yet another birthday. I'm well past 30 but NOWHERE NEAR 40 so I thought I'd compare myself to this standard and see how I've done.



BY 30, YOU SHOULD HAVE:

1. One old boyfriend you can imagine going back to and one who reminds you of how far you've come.

Well, I can say that I did go back to an old friend and we've been married nearly 13 years. And we all know that I have a source to look back on and say "WTF was I thinking?"

2. A decent piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in your family.

I pass this one too. Most of my furniture fits this bill. At 30, I had a few things that I'd bought new. It's a nice feeling.


3. Something perfect to wear if the employer or man of your dreams wants to see you in an hour.

Sadly, No. And I don't think I ever have!

4. A purse, a suitcase and an umbrella you're not ashamed to be seen carrying.

Again, sadly, no. My purse ATM is one I've had for at least five years. It's okay but rather... matronly? Kind of a backpack thing. And I've never had the luxury of anything but super cheap luggage.

5. A youth you're content to move beyond.

Does glad its over count?

6. A past juicy enough that you're looking to forward to retelling it in your old age.

I don't know that it's "juicy" but I've got some good memories.

7. The realization that you are actually going to have an old age—and some money set aside to help fund it.

This is something very unsettling to me at the moment. I have no nest egg - for anything.

8. An e-mail address, a voice mailbox and a bank account—all of which nobody has access to but you.

I have all but the bank account. I do see the value of all three, though.

9. A résume that is not even the slightest bit padded.

I'm thinking of dumbing mine down.

10. One friend who always makes you laugh and one who lets you cry.

Here's an area where I'm blessed. I have several that are multipurpose (and no, that doesn't include Jose!)

11. A set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill and a black lace bra.

Again, 2 of 3 isn't bad, right? Need to work on that black lace thing.

12. Something ridiculously expensive that you bought for yourself, just because you deserve it.

Does upgrading my wedding set count? I don't think it does.

13. The belief that you deserve it.

But I don't!

14. A skin-care regimen, an exercise routine and a plan for dealing with those few other facets of life that don't get better after 30.

Uh...I will plead the fifth except to say I'm trying!

15. A solid start on a satisfying career, a satisfying relationship and all those other facets of life that do get better.

Uh...I've got a pretty great hubby and kids?

BY 30, YOU SHOULD KNOW:

1. How to fall in love without losing yourself.

I agree. I don't think I've done that.

2. How you feel about having kids.

Well, THAT should be obvious.

3. How to quit a job, break up with a man and confront a friend without ruining the friendship.

Well, no matter how hard I try, I haven't mastered this one.

4. When to try harder and when to walk away.

Whoa! I just had a deja vu moment. Freaky. Sometimes I think I try too hard and don't walk away fast enough. Need to listen more to the "Run like hell!" voices.

5. How to kiss in a way that communicates perfectly what you would and wouldn't like to happen next.

*WINK* This is the best part of married life, IMO.

6. The names of: the secretary of state, your great-grandmother and the best tailor in town.

I got this covered! Condoleeza Rice, Bura, Beulah (or Emily?), Jessie and Mae, and my mother ;)

7. How to live alone, even if you don't like to.

Like my kids would let me!

8. How to take control of your own birthday.

Ugh! I should know this. My birthday sucks ass every single year. This year might be better. We're going to see Kenny Chesney on the 10th! But OTOH, we're still beyond broke and no one's interested in our house.

9. That you can't change the length of your calves, the width of your hips or the nature of your parents.

Ah, but I would if I could! Wouldn't you?

10. That your childhood may not have been perfect, but it's over.

And for that I am truly thankful.

11. What you would and wouldn't do for money or love.

And let me say, I'd do a lot more for love than money.

12. That nobody gets away with smoking, drinking, doing drugs or not flossing for very long.

Okay, I think this one is just dumb.

13. Who you can trust, who you can't and why you shouldn't take it personally.

You know, sometimes this takes me off guard. I still get bitten occasionally.

14. Not to apologize for something that isn't your fault.

Why DO we do that?

15. Why they say life begins at 30.

Well, I know that 30 was better than 20. I must confess, however, that I hope 40 beats the shit out of 30.



Strange little set of theories no? I'm still not sure whether I feel better or worse after this little self-assessment. How do you feel?

4 comments:

Barbara said...

Sigh -- some of this I have or have done, much I have not -- and I'm WAY past the 30 mark.

1. no
2. no
3. no
4. ? Where is 4? Why is EVERY ONE OF THESE I've ever done missing a question?
5. I'll Never grow up! - Peter Pan -
6. Uhmmm ... yes and no
7. Work in progress...
8. yes, no, yes
9. what kind of resumé do you have when you've worked for one company for 22 years?
10. Yes, sometimes
11. yes, yes, ... not very comfortable, I hear
12. My computer(s)

and so forth...

You do post the most interesting blog questionaires.

Terez said...

Hmm...not quite 30 yet - I've got a year and a month or so before I get there. Let's see...

1. One old boyfriend you can imagine going back to and one who reminds you of how far you've come.

I suppose I can imagine going back to a couple of them...all the rest of them definitely remind me how far I've come, though...as in, I'm better off single...

2. A decent piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in your family.

Hmm...nope. All passed down.


3. Something perfect to wear if the employer or man of your dreams wants to see you in an hour.

Ha! Not unless jeans and tank tops count. :)

4. A purse, a suitcase and an umbrella you're not ashamed to be seen carrying.

Yup, got all those.

5. A youth you're content to move beyond.

Sure.

6. A past juicy enough that you're looking to forward to retelling it in your old age.

Heh...yeah, there's some juicy stuff in there.

7. The realization that you are actually going to have an old age—and some money set aside to help fund it.

omg...not even.

8. An e-mail address, a voice mailbox and a bank account—all of which nobody has access to but you.

Yup, got all of those.

9. A résume that is not even the slightest bit padded.

Résume? What is that?

10. One friend who always makes you laugh and one who lets you cry.

Yup, got those.

11. A set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill and a black lace bra.

I've got the black lace bra, and my dad gave me his old cordless drill...no screwdrivers, though...

12. Something ridiculously expensive that you bought for yourself, just because you deserve it.

My computer!

13. The belief that you deserve it.

Damn right I do!

14. A skin-care regimen, an exercise routine and a plan for dealing with those few other facets of life that don't get better after 30.

My skin care regimen involves washing my face with Dove soap every day and not wearing makeup.

15. A solid start on a satisfying career, a satisfying relationship and all those other facets of life that do get better.

Nope, nope...um...

BY 30, YOU SHOULD KNOW:

1. How to fall in love without losing yourself.

That one is hard.

2. How you feel about having kids.

If I ever find Mr. Right, however he feels about them is fine - I have no preference.

3. How to quit a job, break up with a man and confront a friend without ruining the friendship.

I'm still friends with my ex-boss; friends with a couple of exes; have several friends that I have confronted/been confronted by - the ones that can't take it, well...they're not my friends any more for a good reason.

4. When to try harder and when to walk away.

It's a fine line...some successes, some failures...

5. How to kiss in a way that communicates perfectly what you would and wouldn't like to happen next.

Got that one down. It's amazingly disappointing how many men don't.

6. The names of: the secretary of state, your great-grandmother and the best tailor in town.

That woman; Cassie, Poppy, Myrtle, and Tiny; tailor?

7. How to live alone, even if you don't like to.

omg, this one is like breathing

8. How to take control of your own birthday.

I feel no need to take control of it, really. If I'm depressed on my birthday, it's because I feel like being depressed. ;)

9. That you can't change the length of your calves, the width of your hips or the nature of your parents.

heh, I'm with you on this one, Tana

10. That your childhood may not have been perfect, but it's over.

this one too

11. What you would and wouldn't do for money or love.

Yup, I'm down with my parameters on this one.

12. That nobody gets away with smoking, drinking, doing drugs or not flossing for very long.

With you on this one too.

13. Who you can trust, who you can't and why you shouldn't take it personally.

Sure...and it's not just who you can/can't trust...everyone has their own specific areas where they can't be trusted.

14. Not to apologize for something that isn't your fault.

This annoys me when other people do it, so I try to avoid it.

15. Why they say life begins at 30.

I sure hope it does...but yeah, I know why. Youth just carries too many delusions about how the world really works.

Okay, that was fun. :)

Lisa said...

Barb!

No four? Four is the question about the suitcase, purse and umbrella. There's a four. I would never miss the four.

Janiece said...

BY 30, YOU SHOULD HAVE:

1. One old boyfriend you can imagine going back to and one who reminds you of how far you've come.
Well, the one I'm glad is gone is in jail and I married the other one--but he's on my shit list today so I'm not too sure about him either!


2. A decent piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in your family.

Oh yeah--done this. Still have a very old couch to replace though.


3. Something perfect to wear if the employer or man of your dreams wants to see you in an hour.

Jean, t-shirts and scrubs. Hope those qualify.

4. A purse, a suitcase and an umbrella you're not ashamed to be seen carrying.

Those I most definitely have

5. A youth you're content to move beyond.

It's only getting better, so I would say I'm content

6. A past juicy enough that you're looking to forward to retelling it in your old age.

Let's just say I hope my daughter does not do some of what I did--and most she won't find out about until she's waaaaaayyyyy older.


7. The realization that you are actually going to have an old age—and some money set aside to help fund it.
Thankfully, I've started that--but it's more because my job has helped with that--otherwise I'd be screwed.

8. An e-mail address, a voice mailbox and a bank account—all of which nobody has access to but you.

I have all of these. Had the bank account for a long time and no one but me can touch it. Learned from the past and what I've seen happen to others.

9. A résume that is not even the slightest bit padded.

Shit--what do I need this for? But yes, I actually have one and a CV too. Who ever thought I'd do something like that???

10. One friend who always makes you laugh and one who lets you cry.

I am SO lucky in this area

11. A set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill and a black lace bra.

Yep--got all of those and I would add a toliet snake to that list--especially after Julia flooded the house just before I was to fly out to Kaz!

12. Something ridiculously expensive that you bought for yourself, just because you deserve it.

It's been a while, but does a massage count?? Again, it's been a while.

13. The belief that you deserve it.
I can only dream


14. A skin-care regimen, an exercise routine and a plan for dealing with those few other facets of life that don't get better after 30.

Skin care just recently. I shouldn't have wrinkles, gray hair and zits. The rest is a struggle.

15. A solid start on a satisfying career, a satisfying relationship and all those other facets of life that do get better.

Good career, husband in the shithouse, and knwoing that I'm a fine wine--better with age.

BY 30, YOU SHOULD KNOW:

1. How to fall in love without losing yourself.

Yep, figured that out after the first loser who is in jail. That's why I went back to school.

2. How you feel about having kids.

Considering what I went through--everyone should know how I feel!

3. How to quit a job, break up with a man and confront a friend without ruining the friendship.
Wrote the book on this one.


4. When to try harder and when to walk away.

I think I've finally figured it out.


5. How to kiss in a way that communicates perfectly what you would and wouldn't like to happen next.

Oh yes--that I've definitely mastered!

6. The names of: the secretary of state, your great-grandmother and the best tailor in town.

What's her name Rice, nope but my mom knows for sure and the tailor's at Macy's rock!!!


7. How to live alone, even if you don't like to.

There are days I would sure like to try.


8. How to take control of your own birthday.

Shit, I always end up working on my birthday.


9. That you can't change the length of your calves, the width of your hips or the nature of your parents.

well, that goes without saying.

10. That your childhood may not have been perfect, but it's over.

yep and hopefully my children's will be better and not material-wise


11. What you would and wouldn't do for money or love.

I do alot for love--money would be nice

12. That nobody gets away with smoking, drinking, doing drugs or not flossing for very long.

Goes without saying.

13. Who you can trust, who you can't and why you shouldn't take it personally.
I'm getting there but there are some darn good actors out there.

14. Not to apologize for something that isn't your fault.

Work with the public and there isn't much choice with this.


15. Why they say life begins at 30.

My life has only gotten better. Again, I'm a fine wine--and getting to be a pretty damn expensive wine at that!